ATR Challenge: Day 3

So, I’ve made it to Day 3. 😉

Let’s begin with what was right about yesterday:

  • I did my daily meditation/prayer
  • I went school
  • I wrote some and read some
  • I spoke with my mother
  • The weather was far better than expected
  • I went to bed at a reasonable hour
  • I received some good news
  • I enjoyed being outside in nature

What about you?  What was right in your life yesterday?

In case you’re wondering about the video above, it is what I’ve been listening to in the mornings for my daily meditation and stretches–perhaps you might enjoy it, too.

 

Acknowledge the Right Of Your Life Challenge: Pre-Challenge Inspiration from TinyBuddha.com

Words of wisdom from by Vishnu TinyBuddha.com on learning to love yourself.

Who to Fall in Love with First: 6 Ways to Love Yourself

Below is an excerpt from the article.

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“Your task is not to seek for Love, but merely to seek and find all the barriers within yourself that you have built against it.” ~Rumi

We’re so busy waiting for someone to love us that we’ve forgotten about the one person we need to love first—ourselves.

Ironically, it was when my ten-year marriage fizzled that I began the innermost process of self-discovery about love.

While discouraged and saddened at the crumbling of our relationship, I began to explore love more. How had it fizzled? Why had we stopped loving each other, and what had happened to our love?

 

30 Day Challenge: Acknowledge the Right of Your Life

"Black Health Is..." Found: http://cdn.madamenoire.com

“Black Health Is…” Found: http://cdn.madamenoire.com

To My New Followers: Welcome to my blog! I am very happy and grateful that you decided to follow me on my journey and hope you will share yours with me as well. 🙂

This is just a brief post about a challenge that I have decided to begin tomorrow. First, however, I just wanted to note that I am one week away from completing my 30 Day Prayer/Meditation Challenge–I really struggle with sticktoitiveness and so I am really proud of myself for coming this far and also for my recent decision to continue the Challenge indefinitely.

I think sometimes we just come across something that works with who we are and are necessary for where we are on our path.  I am glad that the daily practice of prayer/meditation has been helpful for me in clearing my psychological, spiritual and physical space and in paving the way for the new challenge I’ve decided to do.

So, what’s this new challenge?

It’s a challenge that I’m calling: Acknowledge the Right Of Your Life Challenge. Perhaps I should make a hashtag out of it for Twitter and spark others to share in the Challenge.

So, what’s the goal of this challenge?

Simple.  Every day, for the next 30 days, I will write, at least, one thing that is right (positive/awesome/good) in my life.

Why do you want to do this challenge?

Because, from what I understand of myself and looking at the world around me, it is an easy thing to get caught up in what is wrong (negative/awful/bad) with our lives.  

So, I’ve decided to challenge myself for the next 30 days to identify what is working in my life.  It’s simply another step on my path toward self-acceptance and self-actualization.  I hope you will join me. 🙂

 

If you do decide to join me on this challenge, send me a message or comment here and let me know!

And remember, there is always a path to be found…

Until Next Time, 

D.

FMS | The 3 Ds: Disappointments, Decisions, and Determination

“Watch your thoughts; they become words. Watch your words; they become actions. Watch your actions; they become habit. Watch your habits; they become character. Watch your character; it becomes your destiny.”― Lao Tzu

I’ve begun writing another chapter in my life.  Perhaps this chapter ought to be called Sticktoitiveness”.  Why? Well, I like the sound of the word, it makes me smile, and…

Sticktoitiveness is defined as a “dogged perseverance; resolute tenacity“, which has reemerged as a theme/personal quality in my recent life.

It’s one of those many things that you may have had to cast aside, in one way or another, as you learned how to live with a chronic illness, such as fibromyalgia.   It’s also something that, in my opinion, you should never cast aside when you are living with a chronic illness, such as fibromyalgia.

——-

The 3 Ds

Living with a chronic illness, means living with constant internal and external changes.  The changes you undergo will create havoc in self-perception/self-image, in relationships, in goal-setting, in employment, in pacing achievements, and in even cooking pasta (I threw that in just to make sure that you were still paying attention). 😉

In other words, having a chronic illness can mean taking life moment by moment and doing your best to prepare for whatever shifts occur–it’s not an easy task.

I’ve done my share of explaining and lamenting the challenges of having fibromyalgia, so that’s not what this post is about.  If you’re interested in learning the depths of the difficulties, however, you can look in my archives.

This post is about why you, both people who are living with a chronic illness and those who are a part of their lives, must accept and live by the 3 Ds.

What are the 3 Ds?  No, this isn’t about multiple third dimension.  This is about accepting: disappointments, decisions, and determination.

—–

Disappointments, Decisions & Determination

The reality is that, when you are living with a chronic illness, you will face setbacks more often than not.  They are a part of the package.  They are also the first D, i.e., disappointments.

You will experience disappointments like never before… Seriously.

Especially, if you attained the status of ‘responsible adult’, then disappointments (particularly in yourself) will begin to take on a whole new meaning, because others may be dependent upon your well-being for their survival.

Decisions are an everyday part of life, and are the second D.

Decisions, when you have a chronic illness, can no longer be a straightforward and static process. Why? Because decisions can never really be wholly independent from your (unknowable) physical status.

This leaves the third D, and the most important, determination,

If nothing else, I have come to understand that you must remain determined in seeing your goals through to the end, whatever they are and regardless of your chronic illness.  

Yes, having a chronic illness can drag you down, cause you to despair, and generally make living feel less than worthwhile I am not denying that. Certainly, too, there are goals that may need to be altered or even utterly discarded.

Still, I am stating that if you focus on your goals with “dogged perseverance” or “resolute tenacity”, in other words sticktoitiveness, then your goals can serve as a way out of the darker aspects of having a chronic illness.

No matter what, stick to accomplishing whatever goals make your life have meaning, make you happy, and make you feel sane when everything else about you feels less than so.

Until Next Time,

D.

 

All of these…controlled by me

ImageI’ve decided to return to actively practicing a lovingkindness meditation as I recognize that I had allowed feelings of fear, anger, and sadness to overwhelm me and veer me away from my path.

I allowed these feelings to rack my body with pain, my heart with dis-ease, my mind with worry, and my soul with turmoil.

It is truly hard to move forward while walking backwards.

If we keep our view always to that which is behind us, or always to that which we have around us, or always to that which we have ahead of us…I am not sure that we can truly be able to live mindfully or peaceable.

Instead I believe that mindfulness and peaceability comes from reminding ourselves of the following:

We may look behind to remind ourselves of the lessons we have learned. We may look around us to understand where those lessons have brought us. We may look ahead to understand what lessons we must choose to learn to arrive where we choose to be.

In essence, there is no need to despair neither our past, our present, or our future if we each remember that…

Who or what I am.
Who or what I will be.
Who or what I was recently.
All of these…controlled by me.

-db

[Toxic Relationships] Dr. Phil: Protect yourself from BAITERs

Dr. Phil addresses the issue of how to deal with people who may have a toxic impact on your life. Primarily, he focuses on the importance of trusting your instincts or “gut” and how to identify the different types of people who may fall into such a category.

[Reblog] Getting through the Schoolday When You Have FM

[Reblog] Getting through the Schoolday When You Have FM

Article by Kathy Longley

“Coping at school can be tough when you have fibromyalgia. Sitting on uncomfortable chairs, getting to different classes around campus, and carrying all your textbooks can be a challenge. You may also have to cope with teachers who don’t understand why your concentration fades away in the middle of a lesson, or that it was just impossible to get your homework done last night because you were so fatigued. You need a good strategy to tackle the various challenges school can present…”

“The Buddha said…”

“The Buddha said that we are never separated from enlightenment. Even at the times we feel most stuck, we are never alienated from the awakened state. This is a revolutionary assertion. Even ordinary people like us with hang-ups and confusion have this mind of enlightenment called bodhichitta. The openness and warmth of bodhichitta is in fact our true nature and condition. Even when our neurosis feels far more basic than our wisdom, even when we’re feeling most confused and hopeless, bodhichitta—like the open sky—is always here, undiminished by the clouds that temporarily cover it.” – Pema Chödrön, from The Pocket Pema Chödrön

This quote by Pema Chödrön resonated with me today and I hope it will do the same for you.

Also, I wanted to share with you links to the two books that are most dear to me and they are both by Pema Chödrön:  When Things Fall Apart and The Places That Scare YouBoth of these books remind me of my place in the universe and how to take each step forward even when my path is seemingly covered by impenetrable darkness.

There are, have been, and will be moments in our lives when it seems that nothing is going as we had hoped, when we feel our hands are bound by some unknown and unseen force, when we despair of our existence and our present feels profoundly heavier than both our past and imagined future.  Even in these moments, we must maintain our faith in the concept of limitless possibilities and probabilities, in our ability to shift our thinking and thereby shift our emotional space.

In essence, we can change our reality…one step at a time.  After all, no matter the duration of our winter, there will always be a spring.

So, let’s keep our chins up and eyes forward while trusting in our abilities to make it through every single day until we arrive to the places, in which we aspire to be.

Until Next Time,

Diedré

Expanding My Envelope: How I Balanced Work and CFIDS

Expanding My Envelope: How I Balanced Work and CFIDS

Article on chronic fatigue syndrome and being an occupational therapist by  Kristin Scherger

‘I have faced many challenges in my seven years with CFS, but few have been as significant as the fight for my career. When I first became ill, I had just begun working as an occupational therapist, a field I had dreamed of entering since I was a girl. Fresh out of school, I had all the energy and motivation in the world. But a year later I came down with a late winter flu-like illness that I could not shake. Although I didn’t have a name for it at the time, I had begun my adventure with CFS.

My life with CFS was like riding on a roller coaster. When my symptoms were strong, I would lie at home in bed for days. When I felt better, I would drag myself to work for several weeks before collapsing again and returning to bed. I had always been able to push through other illness, but this time “pushing” only made things worse. The unimaginable had indeed occurred, and I was forced into facing the possibility of losing my career.’

Reblog: Jobs & Fibromyalgia

Reblog: Jobs & Fibromyalgia

Article on career-related coping strategies by Cynthia Myers, Demand Media

“The fatigue and muscle aches that characterize fibromyalgia can make it difficult to fulfill many job duties. If you suffer from fibromyalgia, you may find working a full eight-hour day every day too exhausting, and pain can interfere with concentration and memory and reduce your productivity. Finding an employer who is sympathetic to your condition and designing a job that plays to your strengths while allowing flexibility to cope with the limitations of your ailment can be a real challenge.”